Commission vs. Omission

I think we understand a sin of commission: robbery and theft; willful destruction; rape and abuse; intentional injury and murder.  While we might not necessarily understand the thought process that takes place with those acts, we can all agree that sins of commission are wrong.  Sins of commission are intended to hurt, harm and damage physically.   Sins of commission can have long-lasting effects emotionally and psychologically.  Sins of commission are destructive to the human spirit, our core being.

I am, however, puzzled that we don’t take as much offense at sins of omission.  Bystanders watch a person get beaten by a gang and no one comes to his aid.  Someone steals a cellphone or iPod and it is seen by someone who does nothing to prevent it or report it.  Like Sgt. Schultz on the old television show Hogan’s Heroes says, “I know nothing.  I see nothing.  I hear nothing.” These two examples pale in comparison to murder and rape, but aren’t they in the end, as destructive?  Wasn’t it sins of omission that kept Hitler in power?

Where is our sense of duty as human beings to care for and about others?  Where has that gone? Are we that busy with our lives that we stopped caring?  Have we become that numb to each others' needs? 

I think about two very dear, close friends that I’ve lost touch with.  At some point, I moved away, got busy with my life and didn’t write a letter (the days when snail mail was the norm) or make a phone call to keep in touch.  As a result, the friendship died a slow death.  I’ve reached out to both, but they’ve also moved on and perhaps the friendship meant more to me than to them.  I can live with that, but it hurts.  Or perhaps, they’re just too busy.  In any case, I take the blame because it was my act of omission that caused these friendships to die.

I think we need to look at what we don’t say and what we don’t do.  Perhaps our inactions, our lack of support, our lack of words and our lack of help causes others, as well as ourselves, to suffer.  Perhaps our acts of omission causes more harm than we think- not only to ourselves, but to others. Something to think about . . .

Live Your Life, and Make A Difference!

The Prodigal Son

Of all of the characters in the bible who I like and admire, I admire the Prodigal Son and his Father.  To recap:  the youngest son decides to take his share of the inheritance and goes off and squanders it on a lifestyle that I don’t know if anyone would approve of, even by today’s standards.  He runs out of money and as he’s feeding pigs, considers eating what the pigs are eating.  He realizes that even the slaves of his father are living and eating better than he is now.  So he comes home begging forgiveness.

The young man hits rock bottom.  How much lower can he possibly go?  I think not too much more if he’s considering eating the slop the pigs are eating.  But instead of giving up, he goes home.  It takes courage to admit a mistake, to admit you’ve done wrong.  It takes courage to own up to a poor decision, a poor lifestyle choice.  How many times do we see someone hide from it, blame someone else, keep on doing damage to oneself and others by continuing with the poor choice or even worse, give up completely?  This young man doesn’t do any of this.  He comes home, admits his mistake, begs forgiveness, and even offers to live as one of the slaves to earn his keep.  I would say the young man learned a painful, but necessary lesson and grew up.

Who I admire most though is the Father.  According to the story, he sees his son who is still far off.  That implies that he has been looking and waiting for his son to return.  Talk about love and forgiveness!  He didn’t say, “I told you so!”  He didn’t say, “You screwed up!”  He didn’t say, “Forget it.  You had your chance and you blew it!”  No, he didn’t choose any of these options.  Instead, the Father embraced his son.  He put a ring on his finger, a cloak on his shoulders and threw him a party.  I said it once, but talk about love and forgiveness!  No grudge.  No, “You have to earn it!”  Just the love from a Father who cared and was concerned enough to wait and watch and see his Prodigal Son from afar.

I see myself at various times playing the role of the Prodigal Son and at times playing the role of the Father.  How much more I enjoy being the Father!  I get to search and welcome back.  I get to forgive and move on.  I get to feel better and make someone else feel better too.  Two for the price of one really good decision, one really good choice.  How much better can it possibly get?

Life Your Life, and Make A Difference!

Mirrors

I remember as a kid going into a House of Mirrors and laughing at the various distortions reflected back at me.  Oh how I wish I had the mirror that makes me look taller and thinner!  Wish I had one of those for myself.  And I’d certainly like the one that splits me in two- I can see a need for that one some days as busy as I am.

I wonder when you gaze at a mirror while brushing your teeth, fixing your hair or straightening your tie, who is it that reflects back at you?  Is it a distortion such as in the House of Mirrors?  Is it someone you want and aspire to be?  Is it someone you’re disappointed in?  Someone you’d rather not be at all? Are there times when you don’t want to even look in the mirror, ashamed at what you did, what you said, how you acted, what you have become?

I’ve always felt that the words one speaks, the words one writes, and the tone of those words, along with the actions that correspond (or not?) to those words are the measures of the person’s heart and soul.  At times, I catch myself not speaking or acting or writing as the person I want to be, the person I aspire to be and it shames me.  At times, I mouth words that I don’t believe, write words that I don’t believe, and act in a way that, well, isn’t me.  So, I strive to make amends and to do better next time.  I set my best foot forward, start over and try again.

No one is perfect.  I get that.  But I believe that we need to be true to the person who reflects back at us in the mirror, true to the words we speak and write and true to the tone with which those words are spoken and written.  I think we need to be true to how we act.  There needs to be congruence between words, tone and actions.  If not, we’re just distortions.  If we work on congruence, then I think we can be proud of who we see reflecting back at us.

Live Your Life, and Make A Difference!

Your Vision

DeWitt Jones, Photographer for National Geographic, tells the story his father once told him about two stone cutters.  A man posed the question to one: “What are you doing?”  One stone cutter said, “Cutting stone.”  He posed the question to the other and the other answered, “I’m building a cathedral.”  Two men, same job doing the same work.  Two different viewpoints.  Two different Visions.

I have to admit that I am and have always been a ‘glass is almost full’ kind of guy.  Not ‘half full’ but really, ‘almost full’.  Growing up, Pollyanna was one of my favorite movies.  I never watched Winnie The Pooh until we had our first child, Hannah, but as I watched along with her, I found myself chuckling at Eeyore.  What a depressing Vision of life he had!  Yet, each of us know at least one or two Eeyores, and I’m willing to bet that at times, we’ve been one too.  Sort of like Typhoid Mary, an Eeyore can bring down just about anyone.

Perhaps we need to consider if we are like Eeyore and looking for and expecting the bad to occur in life and only willing to see and express the negative.  Or, are we more like Pollyanna and looking for and expecting the good in life and in others and expressing the positive.  Either way, we would be like Typhoid Mary spreading either negativity and sadness or positivity and joy.  You choose!

Live Your Life, and Make A Difference!

A Drop In The Ocean

I take very seriously the statement attributed to Mother Theresa: “It has been said that what we do is only a drop in the ocean.  I say, without that one drop, the ocean would be less.”  This statement has had a profound impact on me, my life, and my attitude about education, about teaching and about learning, about being a parent, mentor and role model.  To me, it explains why I write what I do and why I entered the field of education.  It serves as a great source hope and inspiration for me.

You see, I was a child who was saved by a teacher.  Saved in every sense of the word: emotionally, socially, spiritually, and academically.  Previous to fourth grade, I was considered a slow learner, a kid with a stutter, a kid who was poor, a kid who just couldn’t or didn’t pay attention—after all, I was “Just another Lewis kid.”  I was the second youngest in a family of ten and all of us went through the same grade school.  You couldn’t escape the reputation of the brother or sister who went before.

But then I was lucky enough to land in Mrs. Nancy Mehring’s fourth grade classroom.  She saw something beyond all of that.  She saw a boy with a smile.  She saw a boy who was rather shy and who only needed a chance. 

She began to call on me, asked me my opinion on class issues and asked me to settle disputes among my peers.  She cared about me as a person and to her, I wasn’t just “another Lewis kid.”  In short, she showed an interest in me and took it upon herself to not let me fall through the cracks.  In time, I no longer stuttered, I suddenly had friends, and my grades rose from Ds and Cs to As and Bs.  I became interested in school and, more importantly, in learning. 

I am a living testament to the power of one caring adult, in this case, a teacher.  I am a testament to the power one teacher can have just because she took the time, made an effort and took an interest in me beyond math, beyond spelling and beyond reading and writing.

We have the power to change and transform lives.  All of us!  This is our responsibility each day and every day we come into contact with our kids, with anyone.  I am evidence of that.  This is what Mrs. Mehring did for me.  Mrs. Mehring changed and transformed my life.  And, it began with her.  It was her attitude, her caring, her empathy, and her understanding of the fact that she can and did make a difference in the kids she came into contact with.  She made a difference with me.

I believe we have an obligation to make a difference in kids’ lives, in each other’s lives.  We have a responsibility to make a difference in kids’ lives.  We have the power to touch lives and make a difference.  To me, it is our duty and our responsibility to touch lives and make a difference.  We can fill an ocean with drops of water.  One drop might not seem like a lot, but as Mother Theresa stated, “Without that one drop, the ocean would be less.” 

Live Your Life, And Make A Difference!