Family

Family is incredibly important to me. I am the second youngest of ten, with six sisters and three brothers. That feeling, the importance of family to me, wasn’t always the case. It grew as I matured. When younger, I took it for granted. My brothers were my friends, and we played together. My sisters, all older than me, took care of me, especially Betty. I was her “charge.”

The “charge” system was that an older sibling took care of a younger sibling. Betty bought me my first school clothes. When I was older, I occasionally spent a weekend at her apartment and spent overnights on holidays. She had always “been there” for me. Always.

While I was and am close to all of my brothers and sisters, I think the four boys were the closest, maybe because the separation of age was small. They were my first playmates, especially Jim, four years older than me, and Jeff, four years younger than me.

We had a treehouse nestled high in and anchored by three weeping willow trees at the edge of the river. But it was the green apple tree I remember the best. It was at various times a B52 bomber when we played war, or a fort when playing cowboys and Indians. It was easy to climb, and the branches were strong enough to hold all of us if need be. For the three or four of us, it was perfect.

Our big yard was home to our softball games, our tackle football games- yes, without protective equipment. We took our lumps and bumps and bruises and wore them as badges of honor, if not stupidity. All in good fun. 

It wasn’t until I got my first teaching and coaching job in Wyoming that I realized just how important family was to me. At that time in the late seventies, there were three people per square mile living in Wyoming. Expansive. Somewhat desolate. Rugged, and yet beautiful. But also lonely, and it was that aloneness that made me realize how important family was to me.

For the longest time, even as I taught and coached, I considered the priesthood. That would have been a much different life, and it would have involved a much different kind of family. My consideration of the priesthood was born with my Catholic upbringing, taught by nuns, nurtured and mentored by priests, but in the early eighties, I had pretty much discarded the idea of being a priest. Pretty much, but not totally. Maybe another post on that someday.

After a coaching and school for a master’s degree in Nebraska, and then a teaching and coaching gig back in Wisconsin, one year as a counselor in Wisconsin, I moved to California. The writing bug bit me. But primarily, I was a counselor there for eleven or so years, then I became an associate principal. 

It was in California that two important things happened in my life. The first was my decision to adopt a child. Being single, Guatemala at that time, was sympathetic towards single adults adopting children. But the second important thing that happened in my life was I met Kim, who also was also from Wisconsin. We had to travel 2,000 miles to find each other.

We got married and started our own family. Hannah was born a little over a year later, and one month and one day after she was born, I traveled to Guatemala for William. And then four years later, Emily was born.

We had our own family, the five of us. Even now, with Wil deceased, and with Hannah married to Alex, with their son, Mason, and the birth of Olivia about two weeks away, and with Emily married to Quaevon, it’s our family. Alex and Q might not have been born to us, and even though Wil was adopted, we’re family.

Family isn’t just defined by DNA or blood. Mostly, family is defined by love, by being together, by the feeling we have for each other- together or apart. Family is defined by the heart, by the feeling of protecting those we love and care for. That’s what I’ve come to understand as I matured, as I grew up. As much as I love the family I was born into, I love the family I am a part of now. That won’t change with time or death, with marriage or birth. Love grows. It doesn’t diminish or lessen. My family. Something to think about …

Live Your Life and Make A Difference!

To My Readers:

All of my books are now available in three formats: Audible, Kindle, and Paperback. I am pleased to report that one month after Black Yéʼii became available on Audible, it was the fourth highest seller in the Black Rose Writing catalog. Black Yéʼii received a 2025 Maxy Finalist Award for Thriller and Suspense and previously won a Literary Titan Gold Book Award. 

And my book, Fan Mail became the third highest seller in the Audible format in the Black Rose Writing catalog. Thank you to all who have purchased and read or listened to my books. Don’t forget to leave a rating and/or review of my books. They help with sales.

You can find Black Yéʼii here:

Amazon Link: https://tinyurl.com/25w95xcn

Barnes & Noble Link: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/black-y-700-ii-joseph-lewis/1146257565?ean=9781685135379 

Audible: https://www.audible.com/acx-promo

If you want more of the backstory to Black Yéʼii (The Evil One) check out my previous book, Caught in a Web, which is available in paperback, Kindle, and Audible. BestThrillers called it “One of the best Crime Fiction Books of 2018!” It was also a PenCraft Literary Award Winner!

You can find it here:

Audible Link: https://tinyurl.com/yw23zhfn

Amazon Link: https://amzn.to/2GrU51T

Barnes & Noble Link: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/caught-in-a-web-joseph-lewis/1128250923?ean=9781684330249

Of course, you can find all my books in all formats, their descriptions, and a pay link on my author website at https://www.jrlewisauthor.com 

If you like what you’re reading in these and other posts and find a benefit from it, you can check out my other posts on my Website at https://www.jrlewisauthor.com under the Inspirational Blog tab. 

Please Connect with Me on Social Media:  

Website https://www.jrlewisauthor.com

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61557592103627

LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/joseph-lewis-67917b28/

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/authorjosephlewis/

TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@josephlewis1084

Substack https://tinyurl.com/2m5ckdvh 

Photo courtesy of various family members and friends

 

 

 

Still Adjusting

It’s been a month and a half, but I’m still adjusting to being retired. It’s not easy for me. Not easy at all. I still have this nagging feeling “I should be doing something.” 

Yes, I write, and I read. I clean the house, though not as well as Kim does. I’m mostly responsible for meals, since she’s still working for the next two or three years. So, I’m alone and at home with nothing much to do.

For 49 years, I “lived” at a school. Teacher, coach, counselor, and administrator. It all pretty much ended in 2020. For the past four years, I’ve subbed, I’ve been a part-time teacher, and a part-time counselor. Now, I’ll only sub for administrators or counselors. So far, I did one gig for one day as an administrator, and I have a six-week gig subbing for a counselor going out on maternity leave coming up. For 49 years, I’ve put on slacks, a button-down shirt and a tie, and went to “work.” That’s the life I led, and now, I’m finding “doing nothing” is difficult. 

I miss the day-to-day conversation with people- teachers, staff, and mostly the kids. It’s gone. Yes, I happily and eagerly babysit our grandson, Mason, when there is a need, and come November, I’ll help with our newest grandchild, Olivia, but it isn’t and won’t be an everyday thing. 

This might surprise some of you who “know” me or have worked with me, but I tend to be reserved, if not introverted. At work, I put on my game face as needed, but I am rather quiet, more of a listener than a talker. Being home alone is too quiet. 

I’m excited about the book I’m currently writing. It is number eleven for me, tentatively titled The Disappeared. I can’t wait to sit down and write, and I’m a writer who “thinks” about the plot, conversations, and setting(s) constantly, almost obsessively. I’ve been asked to read and review books by six other authors, so I have my “to be read” stack. But as I said, I miss people. 

I’ve always been spiritual and fairly religious, but I think as I get older, I am more so. Just today, I found out Robert Redford passed away. Add him to the number of icons in music, TV and movies, and in politics, who have passed away. At my age, it causes me to think. Both of my parents and four of my sisters have passed away. That leaves six of us left. I find it unsettling. 

I’m not sure what the answer is, really. Yes, I can go volunteer somewhere. I can go work out at the YMCA. If it comes to it, I guess I can even substitute more- God forbid! 

Honestly, I had been looking forward to retirement, but now, I’m not so sure. There’s a lot- too much- alone time. I’m still learning how to manage that. As I wrote, I’m still adjusting to it. It’s just taking longer than I had expected. Uncomfortably so. Something to think about … 

Live Your Life, and Make A Difference!

For My Readers:   

Good News! My publisher and I are sponsoring a Goodreads Giveaway. It ends on September 24^th. We are giving away 5 signed copies for free. If interested, you can enter here:

Goodreads Book Giveaway Black Yéʼii by Joseph Lewis Released January 02, 2025 This giveaway ends Wednesday, Sept. 24th. giveaway details » Enter Giveaway

Black Yéʼii is now available on Audible, and has quickly become a bestseller in that format. It received a 2025 Maxy Finalist Award for Thriller and Suspense and previously won a Literary Titan Gold Book Award. It is also available in Paperback and on Kindle.  

You can find Black Yéʼii here:

Amazon Link: https://tinyurl.com/25w95xcn

Barnes & Noble Link: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/black-y-700-ii-joseph-lewis/1146257565?ean=9781685135379 

Audible: https://www.audible.com/acx-promo

If you want more of the backstory to Black Yéʼii (The Evil One) check out my previous book, Caught in a Web, which is available in paperback, Kindle, and Audible. BestThrillers called it “One of the best Crime Fiction Books of 2018!” It was also a PenCraft Literary Award Winner!

You can find it here:

Audible Link: https://tinyurl.com/yw23zhfn

Amazon Link: https://amzn.to/2GrU51T

Barnes & Noble Link: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/caught-in-a-web-joseph-lewis/1128250923?ean=9781684330249

Of course, you can find all my books, their descriptions, and a pay link on my author website at https://www.jrlewisauthor.com 

If you like what you’re reading and find a benefit from it, you can check out my other posts on my Website at https://www.jrlewisauthor.com under the Inspirational Blog tab. You can find all ten books, their descriptions, and links for purchase on the same site.  

Please Connect with Me on Social Media:  

Website https://www.jrlewisauthor.com

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61557592103627

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/authorjosephlewis/

TikTok @josephlewis5566  

Substack https://tinyurl.com/2m5ckdvh  

BlueSky @jrlewisauthor.bsky.social

Photo courtesy of Austin Mabe and Unsplash

Cover of Black Yéʼii by David King of Black Rose Writing

 

Not Readily Visible

Did you ever have an encounter with a family member or friend and wonder, “What just happened?” A seemingly light moment suddenly turns on a dime, and feelings are hurt? And you are left wondering if you did or said something wrong or if perhaps there is something unspoken that happened to the family member or friend. I think it’s safe to say it has happened to all of us, either on one end of the stick or the other. 

We just don’t know what is going on in someone’s life at any moment. We don’t know the hidden worry someone might feel that causes the awkward comment, gesture or moment. At that moment, we aren’t in that someone’s shoes or on the path he or she is walking. We just don’t know. 

Back in May, I published a post on my author website titled William Golding, Stephen King, and Bruce Springsteen. While it deals with writing and themes, I believe it applies in small measure to missteps we might have or feel with others. You can find it in total here: https://jrlewisauthor.blog/2025/05/17/william-golding-stephen-king-and-bruce-springsteen/ 

I want to give you a portion of it to explain what I was getting at, so here it goes, but you might want to check out the post in total. It became one of my readers’ favorite posts:

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You’re probably wondering how I came up with these three writers, but I’ll get to that in a minute. Please bear with me while I give some background.

I love to read, and one of my favorite books is Lord of the Flies by William Golding. It is a story about a group of young British military school kids whose plane crashes on a deserted island. The only adult dies shortly after the crash, leaving the island to the kids. As the story unfolds, two sides spring up and become enemies: the hunters led by Jack, and the “others” led- reluctantly, by Ralph.

There are no written laws governing the boys, though Piggy tries to declare some. However, he is killed when one boy pushes him off a cliff. It becomes a story of survival: the boys as a collective group, but specifically, Ralph as he hides and dodges the hunters.

Lord of the Flies is a story of society without norms and without an established leader. At its base, it is a story of good versus evil, and the ending doesn’t declare a winner, though Ralph survives. Sorry for the spoiler, though you probably read this back in your freshman or sophomore year of high school. You might want to pick it up again, especially with what is taking place in our country at the moment.

More recently, Stephen King wrote the book The Stand. Like Lord of the Flies, it is a contemporary story of good vs evil, a land of no laws, and two sides battling it out until good overtakes evil. It really is much more than that, and should be viewed through the lens of what took place Jan. 6th, and what is taking place in our country currently, especially ignoring laws, precedent, and the supreme court, along with the entire court system.

The Stand is one helluva ride as only King can write, and I probably did it injustice with my short synopsis. If you’ve not read it, like Lord of the Flies, you’re missing something. Both books make you think- long after you finish the book.

Now, what do these two fine books written by two literary titans have to do with Bruce Springsteen?

There is a short series of sorts on TV that features singer/songwriters that airs on some obscure channel at odd times of the evening. As I scrolled through the channel guide searching for something to watch, I stumbled on it, and because it was Springsteen, who is one of my favorite writers, I watched it, and then taped it so I could view it again (and again, and again).

It was just him, without his band, sitting on a stool with an acoustic guitar. Directly in front of him was a notebook on a music stand. To his left was a small table with a bottle of water. The audience was small and intimate, not the large venue he and his band are accustomed to. There wasn’t a moderator that I noticed, although there could have been. I was focused solely on him and his music.

Springsteen would play a verse or two and a chorus and then stop. The audience politely applauded, and like me, probably wished he’d do the whole song. But there was an important point he wanted to make with each.

After he’d stop, he’d read from his notebook, and it would sound something like this. “The anguish of love from a teenager’s perspective; loss, hurt, jealously. Parents who didn’t understand. The confused kid who didn’t understand what he wanted or why he wanted it.”

Then he’d smile, look up at the audience and say, “Did I think of all of that when I wrote it?” He’d laugh, shake his head and say, “Absolutely not.” He would laugh again, and the audience with him. Then, he’d hold up a finger and say, “Did I feel all of that when I wrote it?” He’d smile, nod and say, “Absolutely.”

To paraphrase him- badly and probably not doing him justice- I will say all or most writers, including me, don’t think of the weighty issues, the themes of our writing, when we write it. We just write.

Our writing should come from our heart, our experience, our circumstance. The words on our pages or in songs we hear come from our hurts, our joys, our sorrows, our failures, our victories, and our losses.

If we wrote about all of that intentionally, unless it is nonfiction, the story would bog down and the reader would be lost as if he or she slogged through a swamp. But ...

But ... the feelings are there in the words on the page. The themes emerge only after it is written and then interpreted by the reader. Remember what I said in several posts: once the book or story is written, it ceases to be the author’s book or story. The book or story becomes the reader’s, subject to his or her point of view, his or her situation and circumstances with all of his or her experiences- from a lifetime as well as from the moment.

Cam Torrens, award-winning author of the Tyler Zahn thriller series, was kind enough to write a review for my book, Black Yéʼii. He wrote: “On one side, unconditional familial love supported by the camaraderie of law enforcement. On the other? Guns, drugs, and hatred. Black Yé’ii stages an epic battle between good and evil.”

Sublime Book Reviews wrote, “Black Yé’ii explores both the darker side of human nature and the positive theme of family and friendship.”

Brian Kaufman, award-winning author of Persistent Echo, wrote in his review, “The novel features two kinds of family - the supportive kind that rests on unconditional love, and the toxic kind that binds gangs, which is a stark contrast and befits a battle between good and evil.”

Did Torrens, Kaufman and Sublime get it right? Yes, absolutely. But just as Springsteen asked his intimate audience, “Was I thinking of all those things as I wrote it?” I have to shake my head and say, “No.” But like Springsteen, I ask, “Was I feeling those things when I wrote Black Yé’ii? Yes, absolutely.”

Themes emerge AFTER the book (or song) is written and are based on the reader’s view, experience, situation and circumstance. I don’t enjoy slogging through a swamp- in life, in writing, or in reading. And more importantly, I don’t think the reader or listener does either.

The author, whether in a book or a song, tells a story. It is up to the reader or listener to interpret it. The book or the song is theirs, not the author’s …

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I will repeat what I wrote at the outset of this post: We just don’t know what is going on in someone’s life at any moment. We don’t know the hidden worry someone might feel that causes the awkward comment, gesture or moment. At that moment, we aren’t in someone else’s shoes or on the path he or she is walking. We just don’t know.

And like the author who writes a story or song, he or she might not know the impact his or her comment or gesture has on any individual. It doesn’t matter how well we know him or her. It doesn’t matter how much we love him or her. That individual is “feeling” something and has something on his or her mind. Without us asking, “What just happened? Is there something I can help with? What’s going on?” we might never know. All that’s left for us to do at that point is, like the reader, interpret what was said or done and either accept it or reject it. Hopefully, if we care enough about that person, we can empathize and help him or her figure out what is going on before a relationship is damaged beyond repair. Something to think about …

Live Your Life, and Make A Difference!

For My Readers:   

Good News! My publisher and I are sponsoring a Goodreads Giveaway beginning August 27^th and ending September 24^th. We are giving away 5 signed copies for free. If interested, you can enter here:

Goodreads Book Giveaway Black Yéʼii by Joseph Lewis Released January 02 2025 This giveaway has not started. Starts in about 2 months. giveaway details » Enter Giveaway

 

Black Yéʼii is now available on Audible, and has quickly become a bestseller in that format. It received a 2025 Maxy Finalist Award for Thriller and Suspense and previously won a Literary Titan Gold Book Award. It is also available in Paperback and on Kindle.  

You can find Black Yéʼii here:

Amazon Link: https://tinyurl.com/25w95xcn

Barnes & Noble Link: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/black-y-700-ii-joseph-lewis/1146257565?ean=9781685135379 

Audible: https://www.audible.com/acx-promo

If you want more of the backstory to Black Yéʼii (The Evil One) check out my previous book, Caught in a Web, which is available in paperback, Kindle, and Audible. BestThrillers called it “One of the best Crime Fiction Books of 2018!” It was also a PenCraft Literary Award Winner!

You can find it here:

Audible Link: https://tinyurl.com/yw23zhfn

Amazon Link: https://amzn.to/2GrU51T

Barnes & Noble Link: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/caught-in-a-web-joseph-lewis/1128250923?ean=9781684330249

Of course, you can find all my books, their descriptions, and a pay link on my author website at https://www.jrlewisauthor.com 

If you like what you’re reading and find a benefit from it, you can check out my other posts on my Website at https://www.jrlewisauthor.com under the Inspirational Blog tab. You can find all ten books, their descriptions, and links for purchase on the same site.  

Please Connect with Me on Social Media:  

Website https://www.jrlewisauthor.com

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61557592103627

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/authorjosephlewis/

TikTok @josephlewis5566  

Substack https://tinyurl.com/2m5ckdvh  

BlueSky @jrlewisauthor.bsky.social

Photos courtesy of Unknown

Cover of Black Yéʼii by David King of Black Rose Writing