Friday, April 5, 2013

Tip Of The Iceberg

Most of us are familiar with the story and movie The Titanic.  Someone, whether it was the captain or a crew member, wasn’t paying attention to where it was headed and managed to hit an iceberg tearing a hole in the hull of the ‘unsinkable ship’.   As a result, there was a tremendous loss of life.

There are many lessons we can take from this story.  One might be, “there is no such thing as a sure thing.”  Another might simply be, “watch where you’re going!”

I’d like to go a bit deeper. 

Only approximately ten percent of an iceberg is visible and it sits above water.  That which we can see.  The really dangerous part, at approximately ninety percent, sits below the water.  That which we can’t see.  As I understand it, it’s that ninety percent that sunk the Titanic.

Because of my psychology background, I’m tempted to throw a little Freud at you but I won’t.  I don’t think it’s necessary.

But . . .

We’re smart enough to think of any number of directions we can reference when we picture an iceberg.  In a previous post titled Best He Had, I talked about how I made a rash judgment of another based upon what he was wearing at a job fair.  Unfair, unjust, and just plain wrong.  I have no defense except for poor judgment on my part.

This is what our society teaches- look gorgeous, dress for success, drive this car, wear this watch or ring or shop at this jewelry store, get on this diet, that diet, eat this, don’t eat that and on and on.

We are so much more than the ten percent others see.  I’m so much more than the title I carry, and you are so much more than the title you carry.  We don’t take the time to stop and see what is below the surface and like the iceberg, there is so much more to each of us that we don’t see.  Our hopes.  Our dreams.  What makes us laugh.  What makes us cry.  What gives us pause.  What keeps us awake at night. 

We are so much more than our outward appearance. 

And part of this is our fault because we keep these things buried inside.  We don’t share who we are except that tight circle we keep wrapped around us- if we even do so then.  We don’t give others the opportunity to get to know us, to laugh with us, to cry with us.  We don’t share our hopes, our dreams.  We don’t allow others to be silent with us.  We certainly don’t others to know our fears.  No, we mustn’t do that.

But . . .

Doesn’t sharing the fear we have make it less so?  Isn’t it more fun to laugh with someone?  Doesn’t hurt sting less if we have someone who will cry with us or at least, be with us while we cry?  Maybe hold us as we cry?  Isn’t it easier to share a burden with another?  It seems to me that if two or more people carry a boulder, it is easier to carry.  It seems lighter.  Magically so.

We are so much more than . . .

Don’t let society dictate what you can or can’t, do or don’t, should or shouldn’t.  Take the time to show others what sits below our surface.  Help someone discover for him or herself what sits below their surface.  You, and they, might be pleasantly surprised.  It’s better than ripping a hole in the hull and sinking.  Something to think about . . .

Live Your Life, and Make A Difference!

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Thank you for your comment. I welcome your thought. Joe