Friday, March 15, 2013

Choose To Go From Here

This past weekend, I watched a very moving and terrific movie with my family, The Perks Of Being A Wallflower.  I can tell it did a number on me because I keep coming back to the characters and the plotline. 

There was a line from that movie that hit me: “We cannot choose from where we come from, but we can choose where we go from here”.  A lot is said in that one line and if you’re open to it, it can mean several different things to whoever reads it.

In previous posts, I talked about my life growing up.  I came from an emotionally abusive home.  Were it not for my dad and my sisters and brothers . . .  We were there for each other.  We cared about one another.  When one hurt, there was someone to help treat the emotional wounds, to encourage, to help, to hold, to soften and temper the hurt.  It was tough, but we made it.

I also wouldn’t have traded that life for any other.  It made me who I am.  I think that’s why I gravitated to psychology and the behavioral sciences, teaching, and coaching and eventually, counseling.  I think that’s why as an administrator, I spend so much time and capital on relationships. 

But I’ve also moved on.  I’m not the same scared and scarred little boy I once was.  I might carry the scars with me, but they remind me of where I’ve come from, how much I’ve grown, and just as importantly, remind me to try and deal with people- whomever they are- respectfully with care and compassion and kindness.

“We cannot choose from where we come from, but we can choose where we go from here.”

That’s a powerful statement, an uplifting statement, and a statement of hope.  You see, we do have a choice.  We don’t need to continue to do things as we have always done them.  We don’t need to treat people as we’ve always treated them.  And, we don’t need to be treated as we’ve always been treated.  We can choose to be kind.  We can choose to be compassionate.  We can choose to care.  We can step out of an abusive relationship because we don’t need to be abused.  We deserve more.  Really!

Remembering where we came from will guide us to where we want to go.  It is a choice either way.  We can stay where we’ve been or we can Choose Where To Go From Here!   
Something to think about . . .

Live Your Life, and Make A Difference!


  1. I loved that movie. I enjoy your weekly observations very much.

  2. You need to write a book someday. I enjoy reading your stories and I always learn something from them. Thank you for sharing them. Myriam


Thank you for your comment. I welcome your thought. Joe